Well, I've done it.   Something I swore I'd never do.   I'm almost embarrassed to say it, as in the past I've been rude about these sort of people.  I've criticised their appalling dress sense, laughed at their sheep-like mentality, their lack of imagination.    I don't like queuing, crowds, and being unable to escape my environment.     But I've done it........ Deep breath....

........ I've booked a cruise!    I am now officially a cruise ship tourist.    God help me. What have I done?     My only excuse is that on 4 November I have a special birthday coming up, which is making me so traumatised I can't even say the number of my birthday in case I get palpitations and severe anxiety....

We board the boat this Friday, so we have another few hours before I have to wear a hideous  fluorescent tee shirt, lots of cheap blingy jewellery and a straw hat.......

What am I expecting it to be like?  Not sure really.  I think the ship will be bigger than I expect, bearing in mind the biggest sort of ship I have been on so far is a cross channel ferry.   I think there will be loads of corridors and I will not know which floor I am on.    I think there will be lots of queueing for things - at embarkation, at meal times, at lifeboat drill, when waiting to disembark.   It will be very busy and there won't be enough seats in the popular bars or in the theatre, the gym will be full, the hot to will be packed.    I will be thrilled if I am proved wrong for all this!