Wednesday, 4 November 2015

Things I have learned on the cruise ship....

As we didn't fly, you can take unlimited luggage.   We were constrained by how much we could carry on the coach on the way to the ship, but could have easily taken another bag.
I left most of my summer clothes, sleeveless tops, shorts, sunhat, sun lotion, flip flops etc on our yacht Fandancer when we left Greece.   I could have made use of more of these items.  I definitely missed a hat and sun cream. I had my swimming costume but never wore it.   My face is a very attractive lobster red!   And no, I didn't want to pay extortionate prices for a tourist sunhat or sun cream when we went ashore..  I suffered in silence...

You are told each day if the dress code is formal (dinner jacket or suits for men, cocktail or long dresses for ladies), informal (jackets but no ties for men) or casual (anything goes but no shorts or sleeveless tee shirts in evening dining room).    We did find that these rules were not stuck to religiously, and if you don't want to bring suits and jackets it doesn't really matter, you can always go to the serve yourself buffet on the formal evenings instead and wear practically anything.   One guy on our evening dining table that we christened Cabbie Barry, never wore a jacket or even a smart shirt the whole time he was in the dining room, just a dark tee shirt, much to Tim's disgust, who put up with a shirt and jacket every evening, God bless him!

Be prepared to be seated each evening with the same bizarre table guests for the duration of the cruise.   We were too scared to ask to change tables in case they hunted us down and wanted to know why we had deserted them, but at least they weren't  totally doolally, gaga, dribbling, partially deaf or completely senile.     At lunchtimes you can choose to eat in any restaurant or the buffet, and the staff seat you at any table, so you get to meet different people.  Today we have a day at sea, so for lunch we decided to go to a restaurant (basically as it was only ten steps from where we had been sleeping... I mean sitting, and couldn't be bothered to walk up one flight of stairs to the buffet.... We were seated with the old, posh, well to do couple on the ship who had the highest grade cabin with posh balcony (I know this as I spied them sitting out on it one day), also on our table were an ancient Welsh couple who were hard of hearing, the wife had huge flying bouffant hair like long cotton wool, and they were always one sentence behind when they answered your conversational questions, like that Two Ronnies Mastermind sketch....

It is important to be able to find your way back to your cabin from any point in the ship.  It is surprisingly difficult to know which side of the boat is which, and whether you are walking forward or aft, especially when dark, and can't see out of the windows, when you can't even tell which way the ship is sailing!   Even Tim finds this difficult and he knows  everything about boats!

It is not compulsory to eat every single dish at any mealtime.   But strangely, most people, including us, leave this bit of their brain behind and feel compelled to load their plate with every food on offer.   Even though you swear to yourself when you wake up each day that you won't have a full English breakfast every morning, you don't need anything more than a small salad or fruit at lunchtime, you definitely should forego the afternoon tea, and maybe you could just have three courses in the evening not five - your brain shuts down and you find yourself acting as if it is your last ever meal and load your plate at the breakfast and lunch buffet with as much as will fit on it, and in the evening recite the whole five course menu back to the waiter......

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